An Afternoon "God-incidents."

 

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." -- Jeremiah 29:13

It happened to me again...the moment when I am feeling low and discouraged, God sends someone to me to reassure me and make me feel that feeling of peace that alludes me sometimes.

Jim Burson, beloved former basketball and Emeritus professor at Muskingum University stopped in my office this afternoon to touch base about his Author Talk coming up for our library on Thursday. He only stayed for a few minutes, but he made an impact. After our official business was over we discussed the writing process, his book, my book and what writing has done in our lives. He also spoke about how a recent phone call from a mentor of his reassured him and made him feel better. It's funny how we both had experienced that same phenomenon.

My pastor spoke about those kind of events this past Sunday, calling them "God-incidents." God sees our moments of doubt and frustration and sometimes sends a messenger to lift our spirits. Thank you Lord, for my visitor this afternoon!

If you are interested in hearing Coach Burson speak about his book and his life experiences, you are welcome to come to Muskingum University this Thursday, January 15 at 3:30 p.m. in Boyd Science Center, room 336.

Searching for happiness in this land...

 "Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit, says the Lord of hosts."  Zechariah 4:6 

My search for happiness is an up and down journey. There are moments when I feel happy and content. They are but brief moments. The rest of the time, I am left feeling lost, incomplete...lacking. Why does it have to be one way or the other?

In my devotional this morning, Max Lucado says "God graces us with dissatisfaction..." He graces us..He gives us....He allows dissatisfaction to occur in our lives? Why? We are not happy here because we are not SUPPOSED to be happy here! This is not our home. 

"Jesus said, “My kingdom is not of this world...” (John 18:36 NIV)

Why would God create us and place us in a world where we are never going to be happy? As a parent, I want my child to be happy...why wouldn't my Heavenly Father want that for me?

I believe God DOES want us to be happy, but knows that happiness and more will come to us when we reach His kingdom. Our goal in this life is to catch glimpses of that happiness beyond measure and to cultivate our hunger for that happiness. When we realize that happiness can be ours in heaven one day, then we spend our remaining time here on earth getting to know the provider of that heavenly happiness. 

Searching for happiness here on earth is pointless without putting God in the center of that search. If we could find the happiness we long for here on earth, we wouldn't need God. God knows that and allows our unhappiness and discontent so we keep searching.

Thinking about it that way makes my times of unhappiness and discontent more bearable. 

I am but a visitor in this land. My time here can be filled with joy, pain, delight and dispair. But, once my journey in this land is through and I reach my real, true home...I will find the elusive happiness that comes from being home sweet home. 

Timely help...

"Let us boldly approach the throne of our Gracious God, where we may receive ,mercy and His grace to find timely help." Hebrews 4:16

Dear Lord,

I thank you with all my heart for bringing me back to you yet again. I didn't run away from you this time, as I have in the past. No, this time I drifted slowly away. I slowly let other things become the center of my life. I gradually left you behind and let laziness and selfish desires replace my daily quiet time and that special place for you in my heart. I felt the drift - saw it happening- but did nothing to stop it. Over time, I have become detached, unfocused, cold, empty and feeling alone. Problems have occurred, circumstances have come in to complicate my life and further cause me to feel lost and alone. Depression has crept in and made me sad and often my eyes are filled with tears for things lost and for things I don't even understand. Instead of leaning on you in this difficult time, I made obligatory prayers, but do not feel your comforting arms around me.

Last night was one of those nights sitting in front of my television set with tears streaming down my eyes and an aching in my heart. I cried out to you with a fervor I haven't felt in a long time. Help me! Take this emptiness out of my heart! I can't take it anymore!

I was suddenly motivated to go reach into my cedar chest for the journals that I wrote in several years ago. I dug deep in the pile to find the journal that began my daily devotional/journaling habit - Max Lucado's Grace for the Moment daily devotional journal from 12 years ago. I opened to the first page and from the first paragraph, I felt tears streaming down my cheeks and sobs wracking my body, but this time, they were tears of relief. You DID hear my cries and are answering me! Timely help!

I remember the journey I began 12 years ago when I began seriously reading your word, studying it and finding ways that you were listening to my needs and guiding me on how to heal. You brought me out of a dark time then, and I have faith that is what you are doing in my life right now. I must now do the work...change the bad habits that have developed in the last few years and return to the habit of daily quiet time with you. I will again work toward listening to you and learning from you so that I can let my heart be healed and restored once again by your words and your presence.

I ask that you continue to encourage me, nudge me and guide me on that right path that I have been dodging lately. I thank you again for drawing me closer to you!

Amen.

Living and Active Week #1 Day 1

 "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." -- Ecclesiates 4:12

"As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." -- Proverbs 27:17

Good morning! My mom and I have committed to ourselves and to each other that we are going to be part of the Peak313 Living and Active 5 week Challenge! It is a Bible-based healthy living plan that hopefully will get both of us on the right track to a more healthy lifestyle. 

I know I have been a part of a program something like this in the past, and when I work WITH someone, and make myself accountable, I have more success. I live a pretty healthy lifestyle now, EXCEPT that I am too sedentary. I am a librarian who sits all day and then has trouble being motivated to move when I get home from work, so I sit some more. So, I am using this challenge to challenge myself to get off my behind and MOVE! 

So, on Saturday my mom and I made a plan and scheduled times this coming week to walk together. We weighed ourselves (UGH!) and I went to the store and purchased some good healthy food. I bought some new tennis shoes - BRIGHT PINK ones!  I had already used Loseit.com in the past to keep track of my food and exercise, so I signed mom up for that too and she is already more aware of how many calories are in things she is eating! We are ready to roll! I thought I would use my blog to track our progress and encourage mom and I (and others who MIGHT read it too!)

The Bible verses above are our memory verses for this week. They are familiar ones, but good ones to keep in mind as my mom and I begin this challenge together. 

Sitting here writing about this has gotten me really excited! In a couple of hours I will be taking a break, and putting on my hot pink tennis shoes and taking a brisk walk about the beautiful Muskingum University campus where I work. Then tonight when I get home I will do the first workout posted by Clare on the Peak313.com website: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oy10Zpe-kLE

Since I know myself, I know without God in this plan, it will fail. I tell my KidsPraise kids that whenever something is hard for me, the first thing I do is pray! So...

Dear Loving Father God, 

Thank you this day! A beautiful morning drive to work gave me time to marvel at the wonders of your creation. One of the things you created was me...I am fearfully and wonderfully made! It is time for me to take care of this body that you gave me! Help me to stay motivated and strong during this challenge so I can rebuild healthy habits into my life. Thank you for the friendship between me and my mom and help us to help each other stay strong and sharpen each other, just as iron sharpens iron. It is in the precious name of Christ that I ask all these things. Amen.

Questions are blowing through...but my FAITH stands firm!

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. (Psalm 139:13-14 NIV)

When writing this blog, most times I am writing to encourage others and show God's love to people reading. Today, I write to try to put my latest thoughts and questions about God in order. Don't get me wrong, I am not doubting God, or His plans for this world. But I am trying to understand Him better so I can be a better servant for Him.

I received an email yesterday from a friend...one of those forwards where you are to send it to 8 people. You know the kind I am talking about. The message of this email was about how we shouldn't mock God, and those who do come to untimely deaths. For instance, John Lennon, Marilyn Monroe, and other world leaders and people who claimed publicly that they didn't need God, or that Christianity was wrong, or they made fun of God...and then soon after they died.

I am having trouble reconciling in my mind and my heart my God who created us all (see Psalms verse above) and is our loving father, and the vengeful God who kills someone off for making fun of Him. I know God is an all powerful God who can smite his enemies with just a word. I also know the verse that was quoted in that email:

"Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows." (Galatians 6:7 NIV)

I am a mother and even if my child mocked me and made fun of me and spoke bad about me, I wouldn't want to KILL her!

But, maybe I am thinking about this all wrong. Maybe God wanted to prove to his doubting children that He DOES exist! Maybe He wanted to bring these doubting children to Him so they DID believe. We have no idea what God does in the last seconds of a person's life. I am not suggesting that mockers of God are rewarded by going to heaven...I am just saying that perhaps our all powerful, all knowing and loving Father has other plans for his children who have either lost their faith or never knew Him to begin with. 

Why am I worrying my head about this? This is what I do. I see things in this life that are troubling and I go to God and ask Him to help me understand. Questions of this world blow hard...but my faith in God stands firm and keeps me strong. I seek Him every day.

Dear Loving Father,

You are so amazing! Your power and might give me strength when I am weak and confidence when I doubt. Help to ease the questions that arise in my mind and heart from time to time and reassure me that You have EVERYTHING under control! Help me to take that reassurance and let that light shine through me so that others can see You and the love of Christ in me. Help me to have a better understanding of Your ways so that I can live a life that is pleasing to You and use my life to serve You and others every day. In Jesus Holy name, Amen.

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." -- FDR

"Be strong. Take courage. don't be intimidated. Don't give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He's right there with you. He won't let you down; he won't leave you." --Deuteronomy 31:6 The Message Translation

I seem to have a fear, or a great distaste for being alone. I have struggled with this all my life. I don't LIKE being by myself! I have friends who cherish their alone time, but that is not me. While I have read studies that report that extroverted people like myself get their energy from other people and NEED to be around others to be at their best, I have come to realize that this may not just be a personality trait...this might be one of my biggest character flaws.

In the past week, I have been recuperating from a minor surgery. For the first few days, my husband and daughter sat with me and kept an eye on me, especially while I was hopped up on pain meds. From the stories they tell, I have a feeling that I was great entertainment for them during this time. Then, after a few days were over and I was doing better, they left me to rest and heal on my own as they got back to their busy lives. There were a couple of times I wanted to get up and grab their legs and cry "Don't leave me!" But, my body wasn't able to do that, and it wouldn't have been dignified. So, I read, watched movies, watched TV and moped. I'll admit to a few crying spells...there was obviously still pain medication in my system, right?

Feeling better last night, I went to a prayer and healing service, recently entitled The Well, at my church. It was a wonderful time of amazing worship music, prayer, testimonies and fellowship with some of my dear church family members. I am very glad I went. While I prayed for continued healing for my body, I also prayed for emotional healing. There is something broken in me when I have this irrational fear and dislike for being alone.

One of my favorite Bible verses has always been Joshua 1:9 -- "Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified. Do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Well, one of today's verses in my daily devotional was a very similar verse from Deuteronomy that I began this post with. Why is it so hard for me to remember that I am NEVER alone! God is with me wherever I go, whatever I do and however I am feeling. Even when I can't feel Him, He is there. Even if everyone I loved on this earth was gone, I would NOT be alone.

How do I keep this in the front of my mind when I am having my own little pity party about being alone? In the past, I have tried fixing this problem on my own. I filled my time with so many activities and duties there was no time to feel lonely. After all, if I didn't want to be alone, I should be with other people right? Well, the sentiment is right, but the motivation is wrong. When I fill my calendar with things that I HAVE to do, even if they are good and noble things, I am not serving others out of the goodness of my heart. I am serving to fill a void in my heart, and that kind of serving can only lead to resentment, exhaustion and burn out. I have experienced that feeling several times...you would think that I would learn.

One of the people that gave a testimony last night spoke about how sometimes there is something broken in us that we haven't let heal correctly. We have tried to heal that brokenness on own own instead of letting God heal us the way we NEED healed. Because of that, we need to allow God to "re-break" us and heal us in His way. I am praying for that "re-breaking" today. Anytime you know that you are going to have something broken in you, you know it's going to hurt and you dread it. However, today I look forward to God breaking and healing what is broken in me that fears being alone.

Dear Loving Father,
I know that you see in me what needs to be healed. You know exactly what I need to lose my fear and bask in the knowledge of your presence with me at ALL times, especially when I am alone. I ask that today you "re-break" the brokenness inside me and lead me to total healing. I also know that you know my personality better than I know myself. I ask that you help me to schedule my time to serve you from the bottom of my heart and for the right reasons. Fill my days with times of personal time with you, as well as time to mix with other people in my life who feed my need for personal interaction. I thank you for the insight into my own soul so I can ask you for this healing that I didn't even realize that I needed. You are truly a good God...one who fills all my needs! In your awesome name I pray. Amen.

Peace comes in the morning...

"For in the gospel the righteousness of God is revealed - a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: 'The righteous will live by faith.'" -- Romans 1:17

"The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." -- Exodus 14:14

"The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace." -- Romans 8:6

Whether you believe it or not, I believe in my heart that my Father God speaks to my heart exactly when I need Him...when I open my eyes to look for Him. This morning was one of those times. I woke with worries and thoughts racing around in my head; trying to figure out how I was going to fix all these problems that were laying themselves at my feet.

Standing in the shower, almost in tears, I stopped myself and prayed. I asked God to take control of those thoughts. I told God I knew He was in control of everything anyway, and asked Him to quiet my worried soul.

A little while later, I opened the devotional book that I have been reading most mornings and the verses above appeared before my eyes. Call it coincidence if you want, but I call it God speaking to me and reassuring me that it will all be okay. I have FAITH that God IS in control! The Lord is fighting for me, I just have to be still and let Him. The last verse confirmed that I can have peace in my heart when I allow God to control my mind. I gave Him that control standing in the shower. He wouldn't just TAKE control...He was waiting on me to give it up and when I did He then reminded me and reassured me that He has my back.

I know several of my friends have worries and problems on their heart right now. I write this today to encourage them and anyone else reading. If you give up control of your mind and be still...even for just for a moment...God WILL give you peace. Be blessed today!