Hello friends! It has been almost a year since I last wrote in my blog. WOW! I knew it had been a while, but I didn't realize it had been a year! There are many reasons for this lapse in doing something I truly loved doing. One reason may be I was lacking in inspiration and motivation. I just didn't wake up in the morning burning to write something...so I didn't write. So what was the reason for THAT? Time is also a factor. I have been so busy in the last year, the last six months especially, and I just didn't have the time to sit down, collect my thoughts and write them down. I tried once again to do the Nanowrimo challenge to write 50,000 words in the month of November and failed at that too. I just couldn't seem to carve out enough time to do it.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately...what? You find that funny? I know, I think too much all the time! My pastor challenged our whole congregation to choose a word to focus on this year. As he was speaking, one word jumped out at me: PLAN. I think the reason I lacked motivation AND the reason I don't have time is that I don't plan my life very well. For the most part I am a very organized person, but planning my days just wasn't something I took the time to do. See what I mean? It's all about time. I was making my life all about me. Yes, I was doing many things for many people, but maybe all of those things were being done because I don't know how to say no and I want to please everyone all the time. Both of those things are character traits that have plagued me all my life, but this last year I have taken them to new levels.
That old adage, "I haven't planned to fail, I have failed to plan," really works when describing my life recently. I have failed to adequately plan my time, money, meals, my exercise, and my career so all of these areas are not where I would like them to be. What am I doing with my life???
One of my favorite Bible verses, Matthew 25:21, begins "His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant!...' It is one of my favorites because I LONG to hear those words from my Father God when I am finally home with him in heaven where I belong. I want my creator to be proud of the person I was when I was here on earth, so I try hard to be a reflection of Jesus, loving and serving others. Perhaps I am trying too hard. Perhaps my Father will tell me "Well, you tried very hard, but you missed the point!" Oh, that is NOT what I long to hear!
One of the goals I have for myself professionally is to be in a position of leadership where I am able to use the skills and talents that I have developed over the years to motivate people to be the best selves they can be and to make a real difference in an organization and in a community. I have tried to "lead where I am" but, so far, every time I try find that place where I belong and can meet those goals for myself, it never happens exactly the way I thought it would. Is it because these are MY plans for myself and not GOD'S? Is it because I have failed to plan and adequately take care of the resources that God has placed in my hands? The last half of Matthew 25:21 says, "You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things." Have I not been faithful enough? Does it go back to my lack of planning and just letting life take me where it wants? Is that why I constantly feel worn, weary and lacking? Questions! Questions!
I think I have found what I want to write about in the coming days and weeks! Perhaps I need to see what God has to say about planning and time management and study his word, searching for wisdom, guidance, inspiration and motivation. Maybe I need to write about my journey in time management and planning to help myself and others too! So, now I am PLANNING to write! More to come!
