James 1:22 (NIV) Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.
I have discovered, or better yet, I have been reminded that I am a big baby. I am capable of acting so childish that I can forget all the good teachings and lessons I have been taught. It doesn't take much to lead me astray...if I am not staying close to God.
Many people have asked me why I haven't been writing in my blog much recently. There have been many reasons, from lack of time to quite frankly, a lack of desire. There are times I wonder why anyone reads my words...Especially when I am not practicing what I preach. And, there are times I doubt my own words. Luckily though, I have a God who understands me and understands my periods of doubt and confusion. I do not doubt HIS words...and since it is from HIS words that my words come from...I need to stop doubting, right?
Have you ever thought you REALLY knew what God was doing in your life...like you actually felt and heard in that "still small voice" the direction your life was heading? Except...what you THOUGHT was going to happen doesn't happen...it causes confusion and doubt and you just aren't sure of what you thought you were sure of.
I have had that experience lately...it is hard to write spiritual encouragement to others when you get spiritually disappointed yourself. So this morning I looked for verses that would help me listen for God's voice again. I said "Speak Lord, your servant is listening." I found some verses that I thought were appropriate and I LISTENED to my audio Bible, thinking that hearing the majestic "god-like" voice reading them would be better than reading them silently. I have been in this place before...truly wanting and waiting to hear God's reassuring voice. Except...my mind just wouldn't be quiet....my own thoughts and "noise" kept interrupting and I became even more discouraged.
Finally...I looked at the James 1:22 verse above...I can't just listen and expect miracles...I have to be DOING what God's word says too! I looked at my actions in the past several weeks and realize I have been very selfish...I am making it all about me.
Why was I worried about my mom's health? Partly for her benefit, but because I can't picture MY life without her in it. I have talked "gossipy" about some people in my life, thinking I had been mistreated or hurt...again, it's not about them, it is about me. And I made something spectacular yesterday all about me as well.
It is time for me to put me aside and focus on what God is calling me to do...not what I WANT to do, but what HE wants me to do. My life is not about ME...I was created to do God's will. Not because he needs my help, but because he wants me to obey his word and his call. Yes, I believe God wants me to be happy in the things I do...but it may not be easy, and it may not be what I THINK will make me happy.
So, these are my words of advice to myself and to you as well. In everything you do, act in a way that would make God happy. Follow the teachings of Jesus and do what he says to do. Don't just listen to the Word of God...don't just wait around waiting to HEAR...do what is right. God will speak to you eventually and guide you where you are to go. Perhaps he is just waiting on you to "grow up" and act on what you already know before he gives you something new to do.